If dogs could talk
I'm back from hiatus. Seems like my entries has been about dogs lately. Dunno if it's got anything to do with the Year of the Dog?!
Now, another incident happened to me again yesterday. It all started with ...
"Alrighty... alrighty... come on... come on... will he ever pull over now?" Victory panted excitedly in James' van. "I see her now! Sammi, my buddy, how are ya?!" Victory pranced aimlessly round the garden.
Oh crap... Sammi sighed under her breath. Not him again, the stupid notorious punky goldie that creates havoc whenever he comes to my house.
"Oh hello kid!" Sammi said tentatively, putting on a fake smile.
"Let's play catch!" yelled Victory, still prancing aimlessly in circles. Sammi entertained him a while.
"Hey, I've got this itch that doesn't go away. Here, my neck." Sammi's trying her luck.
"Oh no problem buddy! Here, I'll lick it. Hmmm, it tastes good! Hey, buddy, I think your backside is pretty sore too, you want me to do the lickin' too?"
"Yeah, if you don't mind. Thanks kid!" How stupid can he get? Thought Sammi. She must have done good deeds in her life to get this kind of special service from a yound punk after ten over years of waiting.
"Hey kid, here comes your owner..."
"Hey hey hey, no no no, not the leash again.... I don't like the leash... I'm born to run freely... there's so much space here in the garden left unexplored...." Victory barked in disgruntlement. "Hey James! Where're you goin'? Now come back, come back, don't leave me tied up here!" He pleaded with his best puppy-dog-eyed version. That didn't work. James and Jessie were gone, and he's stuck here with the stupid leash!
"No use pleading, they're gone." Sammi smirked, watching him from one corner. "I'm just gonna go inside and cuddle in my favourite carpet while you enjoy the enchanting scenery of the garden. Ta-ta!"
"Yooohoo Sammi buddy, come outside and play with me." This is unfair. Where are the people? Why am I here? Whinned Victory. What to do? What to do? Victory saw the blue drinking basin with interest. Yay! Water! He grinned, walking to take huge mouthful of water out from basin. *Slurp Slurp Slurp* Now, what to do next? Ha! I'll check out the bottom of the car, and maybe I'll get to sniff some puny insects if I'm lucky! Victory continued his adventure.
What a loser! Sammi watched Victory with one eye opened, and then fall back to her siesta.
"Hey Sammi buddy! I think I drank too much water.... I need to go... Sammi buddy... wake up..." Victory started to fidget. *bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark*
Oh look, there's Irene answering my prayers! Victory panted excitedly. (Incidentally, Victory's only capable of 2 expressions - panting excitedly or wincing with puppy-dog eyes). I'm in heaven... I'm in heaven... Victory singing in tune. With a piss piss here, and a piss piss there, here a piss there a piss, everywhere piss piss... Victory thought to himself, Irene's pretty cool. I like her. But I wondered why she's always complaining to Jessie. I'm no mischief, I'm so adorable.The last time she took me out to poo-poo, I behave so intelligently, I did covered up my poo-poo with dirt. But I heard her screaming at the top of her voice, maybe she saw a ghost or somethin'. Not sure. She's cool, but she's weird though...
*click* The auto-gate swang opened. "Ooh, here's my reward for non-stop barking. They are letting me out finally!" Victory sprinted out of the auto-gate ecstatically. *gasp* "Ah, I'm choked! Let go of my leash, Irene!"
Victory continued his fight for freedom. Sammi's long gone far away into the neighbourhood already. "Wait up buddy!" Come on, let me go. I'm choking... I know what to do, I'll turn my head quickly and maybe I'll get the collar off me. Victory tried his stun, but Irene was too alert that she loosen the leash. Victory tried a couple of times more, but to no avail. Okay, one last attempt. I'm just gonna use all of my strength to pull her along. She seems to enjoy it anyway...
*
Sammi came back and Victory followed suit. Sammi warned, "If I were you, I'll be good for a while."
"What are you talking about?" Victory asked quizzically, still feeling a sense of triumph. Sammi didn't reply. She just shrugged and stroll back to her favourite indoor carpet.
*
Later that night, Victory heard Irene complained again during dinner that her hand bleeded from some incident. Victory swear he heard the words stupid, and something like officially don't like you. Maybe she broke up with her boyfriend or something and they fighted with each other, so she hurt herself and now calls her boyfriend stupid and officially declared that she doens't like him. Well, that's her story anyway. In the meantime, I'm happy just being myself, being a dog. Victory smiled at himself in contentment.
Now, another incident happened to me again yesterday. It all started with ...
"Alrighty... alrighty... come on... come on... will he ever pull over now?" Victory panted excitedly in James' van. "I see her now! Sammi, my buddy, how are ya?!" Victory pranced aimlessly round the garden.
Oh crap... Sammi sighed under her breath. Not him again, the stupid notorious punky goldie that creates havoc whenever he comes to my house.
"Oh hello kid!" Sammi said tentatively, putting on a fake smile.
"Let's play catch!" yelled Victory, still prancing aimlessly in circles. Sammi entertained him a while.
"Hey, I've got this itch that doesn't go away. Here, my neck." Sammi's trying her luck.
"Oh no problem buddy! Here, I'll lick it. Hmmm, it tastes good! Hey, buddy, I think your backside is pretty sore too, you want me to do the lickin' too?"
"Yeah, if you don't mind. Thanks kid!" How stupid can he get? Thought Sammi. She must have done good deeds in her life to get this kind of special service from a yound punk after ten over years of waiting.
"Hey kid, here comes your owner..."
"Hey hey hey, no no no, not the leash again.... I don't like the leash... I'm born to run freely... there's so much space here in the garden left unexplored...." Victory barked in disgruntlement. "Hey James! Where're you goin'? Now come back, come back, don't leave me tied up here!" He pleaded with his best puppy-dog-eyed version. That didn't work. James and Jessie were gone, and he's stuck here with the stupid leash!
"No use pleading, they're gone." Sammi smirked, watching him from one corner. "I'm just gonna go inside and cuddle in my favourite carpet while you enjoy the enchanting scenery of the garden. Ta-ta!"
"Yooohoo Sammi buddy, come outside and play with me." This is unfair. Where are the people? Why am I here? Whinned Victory. What to do? What to do? Victory saw the blue drinking basin with interest. Yay! Water! He grinned, walking to take huge mouthful of water out from basin. *Slurp Slurp Slurp* Now, what to do next? Ha! I'll check out the bottom of the car, and maybe I'll get to sniff some puny insects if I'm lucky! Victory continued his adventure.
What a loser! Sammi watched Victory with one eye opened, and then fall back to her siesta.
"Hey Sammi buddy! I think I drank too much water.... I need to go... Sammi buddy... wake up..." Victory started to fidget. *bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark bark*
Oh look, there's Irene answering my prayers! Victory panted excitedly. (Incidentally, Victory's only capable of 2 expressions - panting excitedly or wincing with puppy-dog eyes). I'm in heaven... I'm in heaven... Victory singing in tune. With a piss piss here, and a piss piss there, here a piss there a piss, everywhere piss piss... Victory thought to himself, Irene's pretty cool. I like her. But I wondered why she's always complaining to Jessie. I'm no mischief, I'm so adorable.The last time she took me out to poo-poo, I behave so intelligently, I did covered up my poo-poo with dirt. But I heard her screaming at the top of her voice, maybe she saw a ghost or somethin'. Not sure. She's cool, but she's weird though...
*click* The auto-gate swang opened. "Ooh, here's my reward for non-stop barking. They are letting me out finally!" Victory sprinted out of the auto-gate ecstatically. *gasp* "Ah, I'm choked! Let go of my leash, Irene!"
Victory continued his fight for freedom. Sammi's long gone far away into the neighbourhood already. "Wait up buddy!" Come on, let me go. I'm choking... I know what to do, I'll turn my head quickly and maybe I'll get the collar off me. Victory tried his stun, but Irene was too alert that she loosen the leash. Victory tried a couple of times more, but to no avail. Okay, one last attempt. I'm just gonna use all of my strength to pull her along. She seems to enjoy it anyway...
*
Sammi came back and Victory followed suit. Sammi warned, "If I were you, I'll be good for a while."
"What are you talking about?" Victory asked quizzically, still feeling a sense of triumph. Sammi didn't reply. She just shrugged and stroll back to her favourite indoor carpet.
*
Later that night, Victory heard Irene complained again during dinner that her hand bleeded from some incident. Victory swear he heard the words stupid, and something like officially don't like you. Maybe she broke up with her boyfriend or something and they fighted with each other, so she hurt herself and now calls her boyfriend stupid and officially declared that she doens't like him. Well, that's her story anyway. In the meantime, I'm happy just being myself, being a dog. Victory smiled at himself in contentment.
posted by ink-think at 8:09 AM
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